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Hello, my name is Katherine Hobart and I've written this blog to guide individuals and families in the right direction to achieve healthy relationships. It's important for family members to be supportive of each other and learn about the give and take in a relationship. This blog not only focuses on adult issues, but it's also a tool for parents to use while raising their children. I started this blog because I had witnessed numerous friends and family members struggling with relationship and parenting issues. After learning as much information as I could about common issues that cause problems in relationships and families, I decided to make this knowledge available for everyone who has struggles within their families and relationships.

Fearful Of A Funeral Fiasco? Use These Preplanning Options To Avoid Family Fights At Your Funeral

Relationships & Family Blog

For most families, the death of a loved one is sure to be an extremely stressful event. But for families who are already dealing with strained or difficult relationships, the funeral meant to honor a loved one's life and give closure to those who survive can become the scene of an emotion-filled fiasco instead. If you are pre-planning your funeral arrangements or helping a family member with theirs and would like to avoid this type of family strife, the following tips can help.

Go invitation only

If you know that there are a few family members or friends who are likely to be very disruptive during the funeral service, you may want to consider opting for a private, invitation-only service. In order to do this, you will need to:

  • compile a list of people you want to invite to your funeral and keep the list updated with current contact information on file for each one
  • provide the updated list to your funeral home, as well as your attorney or the person who will be tasked with carrying out your final wishes upon your death
  • arrange for your obituary to either omit funeral information or state that the services are private or by invitation only
  • arrange for the funeral home to advise anyone inquiring about your service that it will be private and authorize them to direct callers to a designated person who will be able to diplomatically address your final wishes with those who may feel excluded

Divide to conquer

In some situations, it may be possible to maintain a peaceful atmosphere at the funeral home by offering separate spaces for those factions who cannot get along with each other. Your funeral home can help you do this by using one or more of the following strategies:

  • offering separate, private seating areas for some attendees
  • offering separate lounge areas to keep attendees separated before and after the service or during visitations
  • scheduling staggered time slots for visitations
  • using a pre-planned seating chart to limit interaction during the service

Because your funeral home has, no doubt, witnessed family meltdowns in the past during stressful funerals, they may also have additional strategies to help you with this problem. Being honest about your concerns when meeting with your funeral home representative while pre-planning your funeral service is the best way to explore all available options and ensure that you find the best possible solution for your needs.

Forego traditional services

If the rifts in your family are extreme and you feel that none of the above options will prevent further problems from erupting, you may choose to forego or postpone a traditional funeral service. Additionally, you may choose to have a private funeral or memorial service with just immediate family members and close friends and hold a public memorial service at a later date, when tension levels may be more relaxed.  

For more help with pre-planning your funeral service, talk to a funeral home like Holcombe-Fisher Funeral Home.

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23 May 2016